Because we touch each other
I think that one of the reasons we all have so much fun at our favorite “C” resort, is that we touch other people. And they touch us, deeply.
For about a week at a time, each couple arrives at their “safe haven”, expecting to have a great time. That’s a given. They look forward to relaxing on the beach, soaking up the rays. Maybe doing some waterfront activities. They will enjoy great food and drink. See some shows, do some touring and most importantly of all, they will meet new people.
This is where that touching thing comes in. No, not that kind of touching. This one reaches our hearts. After we spend a few days with other couples, being on the beach, meeting them in restaurants, hanging out around the main bar, there is a sort of kindred friendship that takes place. Many of us have said that it felt as though we had known each other for a lifetime. Certainly there are those of us who have met other couples and have remained friends, of varying degrees, for a very long time. Sometimes it may be someone that you thought you would never have anything in common with. Other than, perhaps, the love of Couples. But the truth is, we have lots in common with more people than we realize.
When we are all in that totally relaxed state of mind that envelops us while we are “there”, we tend to speak more freely to each other. And the more we do, the more we begin to realize that there seems to be a lot more things that we all have in common.
The obvious differences that distinguishes each of us from one another, is, well, obvious. Skin color, religion, ethnic background, the list is way to long.
However, when we have let down our guard, so to speak, while lounging around the pool, or just being at the resort, we find that by talking to each other, we share much. The same concerns about life are universal. We all struggle with work, kids, parents, school, money, health, and this list is much much longer than the list that contains our differences.
And by talking with a couple from Kansas, who had been talking with a couple from California, and they had been speaking with some people from Germany, there is only one quality that we all share, humanity.
We all feel the pain of some of the terrible things that can happen to any of us. And even when it is not you that suffers personally, you empathize and reach out to a family member, a friend, perhaps even to a total stranger. There is such rejoicing in knowing that despite the myriad of labels that mark us as “different from”, throw away the labels, and you’ll find human beings.
Maybe you’ll be having dinner in your favorite eatery at your favorite resort, and you just happen to strike up a conversation with a couple seated near you. This is not really a hypothetical situation. This happens all the time while many of us are busy vacationing.
You talk about where your from, what do you do for work, how are you liking this place. Conversation flows easily. Then they may share some really tough situation they had to deal with, and what it took to get it resolved. Or, someone may have story of bravery and courage and how it helped them cope. It can bring one to tears.
These kinds of more intermit sharing of life’s harder times, often give us new insight into some of our own struggles and how, perhaps, we could find more productive ways of solving our own riddles.
Sitting beside you, while you enjoy another fabulous meal in Jamaica, is that other couple. A man and a woman. Or any of the other possibilities that exist. It’s all good. The point is, they are just two more humans. Just exactly like you and me. They breath, they eat, they feel love and pain. Just like every other human on the planet. They deal with problems, large and small, they want love and acceptance.
We touch each other, while we are “there”, in so many different ways. Sometimes, you may never realize that something you said to someone, in casual conversation, may have given them a whole new direction in which to make their own life better.
Underneath the make-up and clothing, there is just a human being. I think that’s one of the reasons people find being out on TI or SSB or where ever, invigorating and freeing. You don’t know if the person next to you in the pool is a truck driver or a bank president. And you don’t really care. Just a bunch of human beings having a really great time.
So maybe when the laughter and the celebrating and the party is over, and we all crawl back to our own existence, maybe, just maybe, we may have talked with some total stranger about all kinds of stuff. But perhaps there was something he or she said, or the way they said it, or the way they dealt with something in their lives, that you were also struggling with. One word or phrase, one new idea shared, one hand reaching out to another, and really touching them.
That’s why, I think, we have such a magnificent time at Couples