Yes. I see that coy little smile on your faces. But c'mon, be honest. When Do you get it? In the middle of the night? Late afternoon? Anything could happen around supper time. Do you get it when you are alone? It's okay. We're all friends here. You can admit it and be free of guilt. Getting it alone is perfectly shameless. You can share that moment with whomever you desire, whenever you desire to do so. Everybody wins. How about getting it while you are at work? yah, I've had to deal with that one myself. Now, if you're at work before anyone gets there, that's one thing. I was at work, but I wasn't alone. The store that I work at, A.C.Moore, was open for business. Lots of customers and my fellow employees. They all thought it was a riot.
It occurs to me at this moment, that some of you may not be following my train of thought. I admit. That is not an easy track to follow. What I am asking of all of you is, when does it happen? When does that somewhat euphoric climactic thought creep in to your brain. When are you consumed with the incredible, over whelming, titillating sensation of knowing that you are going to Couples. For the first time or for the umph time. It hits us all.
What's that you say? Oh I see. You thought I was talking about when you GET it. I should have been more clear. However, if there is anyone willing to share, I would be happy to listen.
No, I think that just about every person who has ever gone to any Couples resort will, at some point prior to actually going there, be seized with the thought that he or she is actually really, really, really going. And it can happen at any time. Day or night. All alone or with other people around. It just happens. It's beyond one's control. Anything can set it off. So the chances of getting through any particular day is fraught with land mines. If you hear Jamaican music, you can get it. If your dining on some cheap stateside imitation of jerk chicken, you can get it. If you detect a certain aroma wafting on the wind, you could certainly get it. "WOW! I'M GOING TO COUPLES!!!
And regardless of where or when, how or why, your whole body begins to tremble and tingle. You can feel the heat of the tropics and you break out in a heavy sweat. Your face lights up with the intensity of a lighthouse beacon. Foam is beginning to form in your mouth and you're drooling like Homer Simpson. Then you hear someone yell "WHOOPEE" very very loudly. When you recover, you realize it was your voice you and hundreds of others heard. The mall association said that if you conquer this problem, you could come back. But in the meantime, "SECURITY"!!
When you try to capture all of the energy, joy, amusement and sheer wonderfulness of a Couples experience, it is indeed, a daunting task. So the best that you can hope for is to channel a small amount in to each and every day. You will have the choice as to where and when you will display this orgasmic pleasure. Then each time that it hits you, each time you get it, you will be able to remain calm and composed. If you are in a crowd of people, just say, "Excuse me for just a moment, would you please"? Then scurry off to the nearest bathroom and let it rip. Scream, yell, jump up and down. Hopefully, there will be no one else there. Really hard to explain.
It's really great to get it in the car. You're out cruisin around, doing mundane things on a mundane Monday morning. Then a tune comes on that triggers what I call the "Couples Rush". Also known as CR. The symptoms are varied and as diverse as the each individual that tastes this delectable Caribbean morsel.
Here are some examples of someone who may be having CR: Someone walking in the rain with a smile on their face, could be having a CR. The person in the car next to you that is rocking out to a reggae beat while we are stuck in, what seems like, a hundred mile back up, may be feeling a CR. And I may as well set the records straight. Remember the film "When Harry Met Sally"? Okay, in the scene when the woman says, "I'll have what she's having". Sally was having a really really nice CR. Most people report mild to moderate sweating, excess saliva, bouts of singing, dancing, yelling, jumping up and down, hugging people you don't know, uncontrollable excitement. The list goes on and on. It should be noted here that there is absolutely no negative energy in connection with having a CR. Only positive results each and every time. It is up to the user to decide how to use this new amazing stress reducer, life enhancer button.
Having a CR can be worked in to any schedule, under all kinds of scenarios. You may have as few or as many CRs as your system can stand. Get some in the morning while you are getting ready for the day. On the way to work you'll be humming, "Don't worry, bout a ting. Cause evry little ting gonna be awright" See, it's working already. (Please bow your heads) "Thank you for that great CR".
The CR has great powers. All of them for the good. Remember, there are only positive, life sustaining results each and every time. Only momentary lightheartedness and sublime contentment.
Have them alone, with friends, on the phone, watching TV, on the Throne. Any place that you can let your mind drift for what ever amount of time you can manage at the time. If possible, close your eyes and let your mind's eye transport you. I don't recommend this particular procedure while you are operating any large construction equipment, snowmobile, bobsled or lawn mower.
Get know a good CR. It's gaurenteed to make you smile. I promise.