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  1. #1

    Default How do I explain how important weddings are to my boyfriend?

    Every girl knows what im talking about. You know, why weddings, dressing up, and walking down the aisle are such huge dreams of Hollister Canada girls. My boyfriend thinks it's stupid and doesn't think when we get married, that we should have a wedding and that it's a waist of money.

    Can you list some reasons why it's so important and why every detail is important? I can't seem to explain my feelings towards this.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    2,361

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    If he doesn't get it, maybe he's too immature to get married, I'm just sayin.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Posts
    1,417

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    As someone who had a big wedding (and all of the family bickering that goes along with it), I have to say that the wedding is not all that important. It's the MARRIAGE that is important. Twenty-five years from now, you'll look back and think it was silly to fight over flowers, invitations, etc.

    Too many people spend time thinking about one day rather than their lifetime together. Have you talked about the things that really matter, such as: How will you manage your money? Will you combine your incomes or have separate accounts? Are you both of the same or different religions? If you have children, in which faith will they be baptized? Do you both want children? If so, how many? If one of you does not want children, is the other comfortable with the thought of never having a child? If you do have children, will one of you stay at home with them, or will you both continue to work? Are you both on the same page with this? How do you feel about extended family? How often will you visit or have them visit? Do you welcome unannounced visits or expect family to call before dropping by? How will you handle conflict with extended family? How will you handle competing familial demands at holidays?

    If we had to do it all over again, we would have gotten married in Jamaica and been able to buy our first house that much earlier (we paid for our wedding ourselves). In doing so, we also would have avoided a lot of family conflict, the ripples of which persist 25 years later . . .
    Pamela
    I know everything, and I'm always right (just ask my husband).

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    Posts
    140

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    The fact that you have to is a bad sign. I don't mean that to be rude, but to offer some advice from someone who's been there with an ex. If he doesn't take the wedding seriously, how do you think he'll view the marriage? A wedding is about pledging love and respect and he's showing you very little respect at the moment. I'd sit him down and explain to him that it is very important to you, why and if he still doesn't come around I'd wait on the marriage till he does.
    Susan & Chris
    CTI 2003, 2004
    CSS 2008, 2013!

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Posts
    2,361

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    I'm sorry if I was a little harsh but its the truth. Are you guys a young couple? I can speak from experience. I got married the first time at 21 and I was extremely immature. That marriage lasted 5 years.
    Anyway, the second time around I was 40 and the beauty of Couples is that it can be a very small , private affair, short and sweet. It was basically free too besides the gov fee and photos and dvd. It was the best decision we ever made.
    Don't push him, it sounds like he might not be ready and couples will be there when the time is right.

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