I have never been one to pay much attention to that cute little three letter trio, age. Life becomes more and more interesting the older and wiser you become. To be old and not have gained some insight, wisdom, experience, that would be pointless. But the spinning never stops, the river of life meanders and the mind wanders as they shadow each other moving alone side each other. Each at their own pace. Time is the other feature in this lifetime play we are in. One can be in the wrong place and the wrong time. That usually sucks. How about the right place but the wrong time. We pretty much know the outcome. It is when the current of the river life, a life of the usual ups and downs, good and bad, and so on. That part of life is fluid and bends and folds and gets stapled. But the resilient life just smooths right over. Time, on the other hand, is pretty much straight up. The tick, tick, tick sets the pace for the world Very ridged. Very formatted. Precise. While life is trying to live with as much freedom as possible. Life has been known to go off in a thousand directions. Very loose. Time and life. Probably would have made good reading material. I am currently on my annual visit and introduction to the next number of my life so far. So ladies and gentlemen. I would like to introduce to you, this brand new lucky number for the full year...........here it is folks. The number is 70. On the eighth of the month of November. And the older I become, the more I begin to hear the words coming out of my mouth that sound exactly like my parents always said. "When I was a kid, we never had any of this stuff". I would wager there are just a few of you out there that have heard the same thing, or variations on the theme. And you vowed, no you swore on a stack that you would never, never, ever never say that to your wonderful children. Fat chance you got of that not happening. Age and time. Welcome them. Embrace them. Tolerate them. Learn to live with them. You can't get away from either of them. Don't even try. Make peace with them. There must be some sort of marker that perhaps we have to identify when it is that the children become their worst nightmare. They turn into their parents. Those same two loving adorable wonderful people that may have been fun when you were young, how could this have happened? Was it the time you wore a hat just like the one parent had? Or when you were overheard whispering to some cherub like little person, "When I was a kid............" I know. It's frightening. We see it heading straight for us and we still get slammed when it arrives. Age. One day you're just feeling great. Other than some little problems, things were just put-put putting along. Then with no warning signs whatsoever, it's like getting an attitude adjustment you didn't even know you had scheduled. And you don't want to mess around with an attitude. They can get all uppity. No, you don't want to piss off an attitude. Else you'll be in for a whole lot of nothing good.
Here's an example of what I mean. You have a friend that you have known for a very long time. You've kept in touch with phone calls and letters. You even figured out how to send an e-mail or two. This friend doesn't live close enough to visit. You haven't seen each other for quite a number of years. Suddenly, for whatever reason, the two of you run in to each other. You're standing looking at this person that you hardly recognize. He/she looked really old to you. And the thought crossed your mind concerning how you are looking. After all, your friend is more than three years younger than you. And they look so old . Then from some place in the crevices of your mind comes a terrifying thought. You may be getting the "O" thing. Oh o. Now the secret to your numbers going up every year has nothing to do with inflation. No, that's going to come as long as you have some sort of pulse and a trickle of air left to breath. So for the most part one shouldn't pay much attention to this annual event. As anyone who has ever been to any the four outstanding Couples resorts knows, age really is just a number. But we homo sapiens have a way of preforming our own brand of stupidity when, for a reason that I just can't fathom, we begin to think of the "number" as something more than it is. A silent reminder every day of our life. We may begin to see the "number" as having power over your thoughts. Beginning to dictate what you should be doing, or eating, or how you act. All that from a couple of numbers.
Age and time. You will never see one without the other. The are linked . Even though each "number" stands alone. Believe me, when your pair shows up, I hope you know it.
For myself, I think, or thought, that I had some good genes. My grandfather lived to be 100 and my dad was 92. That was looking promising. I can only hope that my 'jeans' would wear well with me. Time and more aging must first take place. See me in say twenty years.
70 You know, when you look at the two symbols standing there, they don't seem to get any sense of anything. In fact, I know I've seen double digits bigger than that. What's the big deal? That's how I have felt most of my adult life.
But for the past couple of years, age and time have been on mind. I don't think that I am obsessive, just unusually focused on something that can not be changed in any way, shape or by any amount of money. Age and Time. The numbers even sound different. Well, it did. So I began to make some mental notes as to my frame of mind, s, short circuits, and begin looking for answers to questions I never asked. But the mental notes usually get lost in the vastness of my cranium. Consequently, the mental note did little or nothing for me. So I have come to rely on some form of visual word. I find that if I can see the asterisk in front of me, then it gives me that extra reminder to keep going for the gold. And it doesn't have to be hand written. I am far from a purist. I write it down for visual reminders.
Part of the reason for my untimely interest in time, stems from medical issues. In June of 2008, I was diagnosed with prostate cancer. For the next year or so, there was much to endure. And endure I did, but with a few scars. Mentally and physically, I was exhausted. So there was all that. I felt like Jacob Marley, dragging all this weight of his life throughout eternity. So I began working on unloading.
An honest self appraisal is just about impossible. We have biases. Okay, I see there are a few hands raised out there. Maybe you guys are just lucky. Remember, I said, "honest". I like to rely on the comments and criticism from friends, family, enemies, and others. I let lots of stuff get in, and try to find the tiny gem in all that bullshit. The other poop that funnels in is more often not, discarded within a very short period of time. I find that I get a more balanced, objective, fresh look at my reflection.
November 8, 1940. That was my beginning. Even though we will not be at CTI until the 10th, were gonna have a PAR-TA. You are all invited. Well at least everyone that's there. This will offer me yet one more way that I can continue to make the vitally important adjustments that are so very necessary for this thrilling, merry-go-once once around that we affectionately call, life.
Whether your thirty going on sixty, or seventy going on fifty. The sooner we embrace those long time buddies, those lifetime companions, Arthur Age and Tommy Time, the sooner we can get on with living. They are quite a pair. Age and Time.
I enjoyed reading your thoughts...your observations. I'm not all that far behind you in age and find that I am most aware of it when birthday time rolls around...or the occasional instance when someone asks "How old are you?"
I always forget to tell them (until later of course) that I'd heard it was rude to ask a woman that question. Instead...I tell them my age, then have to correct it because I've forgotten that another birthday or two has indeed come and gone but the birthday number now doesn't sound right.
In fact, even on the birthday itself...I say the number out loud. Think to myself "No, that can't be right." Do the year's subtraction on paper. "Nope, my math must be bad...that can't be right." Get out the calculator and try again. "No....batteries must not be working...I'm THAT old now?? When did that happen??????"
Have found that lately, more and more and more, when things bother me or tend to bring down a mood to a level that is not "on top"...if I repeat a couple of times "I have no past, I have no future...I have only now, at this very moment, and now I am _______" (completed with whatever I am doing or thinking that is of positive nature) then I forget the little worries and nagging areas I can do nothing about. It helps.
And yes, you've hit one thought right on the money...appreciate, bless and love those you know who are important in your life...those who are not close but can become so...those little moments of beauty and enjoyment that hold so much pleasure that the 'youngsters' tend to overlook as they rush through time.
Did you ever have the chance to read TUESDAYS WITH MORRIE? It's been out for quite some time...I found my copy months ago and reread it for the third time...I love it. What an incredibly wise and loving man Morrie was. I wonder what our world would be like if we all lived and practiced his outlook on life?