Thread: Need advice-bridal registry

I've been with my boyfriend for 16.5 years. We are FINALLY getting married on March 14, 2012 (on our 17 year dating anniversary ).

We are getting married at CSA and can't wait. But. We are not having any guests. One: we didn't really invite anyone and two: it is rather expensive for most of our friends/family. My dilemma - bridal registry.

Certainly after all these years together we could use an upgrade on our household items but that wasn't our intention. We were going to go with the wedding website/registry through the Couples site but when I mentioned it to my family they were pretty disapproving I'm a much more 'giving' type person and have a hard time asking anyone to give me anything as it is-now I'm even more uncertain about it.

Is it wrong to register for some spa items, private beach dinner, photography (I hired Stacey Clarke but I'll get resort photos/video too if I can swing it financially), contributions towards the trip, and maybe an excursion or two? We are going to have a party here (probably June) for our friends and family so it's not like we won't share the event with them---it'll just be after the fact via pix

If I shouldn't register at all or if I should only register for household items they could bring to the party then that's what I'll do. I don't want to be inappropriate.

What do you guys think?

Ok, so I may be somewhat biased, but.... This is your wedding and you should decide what is best for the two of you.

Starting a life together after sharing a romantic honeymoon - and have your friends and family help you - would seem more important than whether or not you get a blender....

There is nothing at all wrong with registering for what you want! Chris and I are only registerd on the Couples site. We have been together 3.5 years and we live together. We have pretty much everything we need at home (not that an upgrade wouldn't be *nice*), but we feel as though that type of registry is more appropriate for younger couples who are just starting to build a life. He's 41 and I'm 39...we have lives. lol

Was your family disapproving of you having a registry at all, or just the type of registry?

IMHO...since you've been together for 17 years, I would assume you have an established household and a blender is the last thing you need...I'm sure there will be many thoughtful people in your family who will share in your joy and send you a gift....here's a thought.....when you send your announcements (if that's what you're doing), how about a .... "in lieu of gifts, please send a donation to the Issa Trust Foundation" and share your love of each other and Jamaica with the children of this wonderful paradise...

I was concerned about the same thing, but decided that we should register and let our friends and family have the option and if they wanted to bring a wraped gift I also registered at the regular places, target, Kohls, bed bath beyond.......that way I gave choices. For everyone who ask what we want I tell them about the webpage btw you can include places like target on that page, and that we would love do do things on our weddingmoon.

I'd say make the registry and add things at a variety of price levels. If anyone asks you "Where are you registered?" prior to the wedding, then direct them to the website. You may want to make a different registry for the post-wedding party.

Anyone who doesn't ask or disapproves of the idea doesn't have to know it exists.

We are doing the same thing as you -- wedding for immediate family only and a party once we return to the states. We're registered at Amazon and are also looking into a service that accepts "cash" paypal style.

Thanks! You guys rock!!

My family was of the opinion we couldn't register for anything since we weren't inviting anyone to the actual wedding. I didn't think it was completely out of line considering we will be throwing a party mostly for them when we return but, well, you know how it goes - don't want to start off making anyone mad

I've considered a Target, Bed Bath and Beyond, etc registry for a few small things that certainly could use replacing but then thought maybe adding that to the other list would really be too much. Maybe I'll just do it so I can offer it to anyone who wrinkles their nose at the trip registry

Thanks for confirming I'm not totally off my rocker for wanting to use the Couples related registry. I definitely have lots of pricing options and think they will probably be surprised by the gift choices they have...dinner on the beach, spa services, excursions etc.

you should do the registry if you want! you are having a party so you are including your family...if you were eloping and your family was against your marriage..then yea, dont ask for a blender! hahah but thats not the case. I am going to book my wedding at CSA verrrrrrrrrry soon and we are doing the same thing...inviting immediate family to wedding, however it is not looking like many will be able to swing that so we are having a party for family & friends when we get back. Im definitely doing the Couples website thingy. You said they disapproved because you are not inviting people, but you dont invite most people when you give birth either but you still get to have a baby shower!!! right, right? hahahah